Farking Pissed and Scared Shit

7.30pm ::Raffles City S.C, JCO::
I am so fucking pissed but more horribly worried. So worried that I just might break down right here at JCO (See. I am such a mess that I ended up coffeeing at JCO when I've sworn my life to Starbucks). Why the hell am I eating donuts?

Cos coffee can't make you pregnant

Recap. Here's what just happened:

I was called by Short-Dick-Sam (SDS). He assumed I will bring condoms, and I expected him to BYOC (bring your own condom), so in the end we had to do it raw, which I know is risky but I let it pass once in a while. The infuriating thing was, stupid SDS cummed inside of me, which I have never ever EVER allowed, even with boyfriends. No one!

After grabbing my $tash, I stormed off, obviously upset. And now, I am half shaking and waiting for the pharmacist at Watsons to come back from her dinner break at 8.20pm so that she can prescribe me the wonder-pills.

God forbid if I get knocked up frm this. I would rather die.

Oh no. My tummy feels funny. I NEED THOSE PILLS!!! *helllllppppppp!!!!!!!!!!*

8.20pm
::Watsons Pharmacy::

"Hi, do you have birth control pills"

"Sorry ma'am but those have to be prescribed by a GP", says the chirpy pharmacist who seemed like she had a good dinner break. Those 2 JCO donuts were the only thing I've had since morning.

Fuck. She doesn't have those pills.
Are there any clinics around here?...No.
Which clinic is still open at this hour?...
Ah. The 24-hr one near my house!!!

I had to abandon my orginal plan to hang out and soak in the F1 atmosphere at Raffles City. Only atmosphere now that has got my entire body soaked is panic and distress. These lips have been cursing SDS non-stop. Outside, the thundering roar of the F1 cars was drowned by the drumming of my heart. It has been 1 and a half hours since the sperms invaded my oysters. Oh no, I can just imagine them swimming up, up and away. I remember back in secondary school, during Biology class that a drop of semen the size of an eye-pin contained millions of sperms! I quitely prayed for SDS to have low sperm count or some kind of defect. I must take those wonder-pills to stop them sperms. Luckily it was easy to get a cab and I was in my very own street race to the clinic. How I wish the taxi driver was Alonso or Webber, instead of this ah-pek who has very slow :'( **on the verge of tears** My heart was beating so fast that I had to rest my right palm over my left chest till we reached the clinic.

9.00pm
::24-hour Clinic::

While waiting for my name to be called, I tried to rehearse my lines to avoid embarassing myself in front of the doctor. Now how do I say it with a straight face, without stammering? I tried to relax and calm myself down. So I picked up a magazine to read.

Are you mocking me? You're really not helping Fann Wong. Stop smiling! >(

When I finally entered the doctor's room, I was shocked to find that it was a male doctor. Usually it is a lady doctor. Oh no... how do I ask this fella for the pills?

"I was wondering if you could prescribe me some birth control pills?" I asked non-chalantly.

"Sure. When was your last menses?... Do you have children... Do you use protection?" Bla bla bla...

If SDS had used protection, I wouldn't be having a panic attack right now, halfwit!!!

The young doctor went on to ask me a string of questions before he explained how to take the medicines and its possible symptoms. The part that left me puzzled was when he told me to take the pills when my menses come and I have to take it for a course of 21 days. 

Huh? I thought I need these pills to make sure that my menses come and I don't bake a bun in my oven?

At the risk of sounding stupid, I asked the doctor again to be sure.

"Oh, did you mean 'morning-after' pills? Sure, I can prescribe that for you." I thought I saw a little smirk on his face.

SO THAT'S WHAT IT'S CALLED?!!!! MORNING-AFTER PILLS!!! Who's the champion halfwit now?

Postinor 2. I never thought these pills would be so expensive. $38 for 2 tiny pops, one to be taken within 48hrs after unprotected sex and the 2nd pop 12hrs later. I hopped over to the 7-11 next door and swallowed my pill there and then. I can't take chances. I CANNOT get pregnant. Haunting images start to cloud my thoughts again - pregnancy test kits, hospital visits, abortion... AARRRRRGGGHHHHHHH!!!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

10.30pm
::Home::

Back home I got more bad news. I had planned to run some pretty important errands tomorrow morning but my folks insisted that I run some errands for them instead. Being one who never refuses whatever my parents say or ask me to do, I obliged without any complains and then when into my room.

Breathe.... Breathe. Please don't cry. Pleaseeee..... I begged the tears not to fall but the waterworks did not heed my plea.

I felt so tired. So frustrated. So upset. So angry.... at everything! At stupid SDS for cumming inside me. For wasting money and taking the cab to and fro. For having to spend on medicine. For the horrible feeling of worrying that I could get pregnant. For not being able to enjoy the F1 atmosphere at Raffles City. For being hungry and didnt have time to eat since morning. For having my plans for tomorrow spoilt just to accomodate others. For not being able to tell ANYONE about this, come home, put on a sweet face and pretend that my evening was just fine and dandy.

Mostly I cried becos I was terribly, horribly and scared to death that I could get pregnant cos that was the only thing that I have of myself, reserved for my future husband, if I ever do find him some day, cos I have nothing left to offer. For who could ever love a prostitute... right?

If I get pregnant, I'm finished. My life will be in ruins. Maybe this is God's way of teaching me a lesson. This is supposed to be my last week of whoring. I remembered telling myself earlier this year - untill F1 weekend (cos thats when S'pore gets a lot of visitors who needs erm, 'company'). And then I will quit.

I cried even more when I thought about my boy, Meatloaf, and the hypothetical name of our imaginery daughter that would bear his last name. How I miss him since I saw him last weekend and how I won't share my feelings with him cos I'm afraid I'll scare him away. Furthermore, I don't deserve him. He doesn't know I do 'THIS' and I hate how I can't open up to him cos I have so many secrets and 'cigarette butts under my pillow'. My chest felt like it could just burst.

12.15am
::Bathroom::
.
Never have I been happier to see... blood.
.
.
.
Got my menses.

No wonder I felt so melodramatic. Also kinda explains the wild waterworks. What a fuckin crazy day... Thank you God.

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A Close Encounter With A Prostitute In Las Vegas

An honest and interesting point of view :) :) :)

Nevada is infamous for legalized prostitution. One of a kind in respect to the entire country USA. While at Vegas, i thought of hooking up with a hooker. I want to get a blowjob, and want to carry a girl, and other less speakable things. Along The Strip at night, little cards are handed out to pedestrians. These cards have star-nippled girls and phone numbers printed on them. They seem to be advertisement for prostitutes. After some research, it seems that the ladies and phone numbers on the card only offer erotic dances sort of thing, and that prostitution is actually not legal in Clark County, where Las Vegas is in. This is a dubious fact, and probably not strictly enforced. I mean c'mon, people came from all over the world to Vegas for the sin, and fornication is a grandest sin. It is not likely that magnates or vacationers staying in lush Vegas hotels surrounded by skin shows couldn't get a commercial lay. Though, it is true that one don't see pimps or harlots soliciting tourists along The Strip, nor brothels to be seen in the city. It makes sense. Tourists offended by prostitution won't spoil their vacation by harlots strutting their stuff on the street, while sex seekers can easily find their trading partner unobstructed by rules of conduct of the community. A optimal strategy to suck the blood of tourists on this issue.

I've also found these young things on vegasadultdirectory.com. Life is good. (the urls are all gone).

While doing research on prostitutes, one phenomenon stands out. That there are lots of advertisements from all medias, so many ladies, so many lines of peddling, so many styles... i thought of the economics of competition. I imagine being a successful prostitute ain't as easy even if you are a beauty. One has to find a channel. On one hand, agencies suck huge amount off your bodily work, perhaps 50%, on the other hand, a independent prostitute faces a plethora of problems, among which is advertisement, safety, competition, and so on. I guess life is hard among all professions.

At the end, i called up about 3 numbers. One of them is from a porn ad mag. On her ad, she said she is a “Western doll” who speaks Chinese. From the photo, she might be a Eurasian. I thought Eurasians are sexy and exotic and that since she had interest in Chinese that might make me feel welcome as a first timer, so i called her. She is really friendly, told me that it is $185 for 1 hour dance stuff, and she also does few “other things”. I tried to ask what things exactly, she asked me how much i'm willing to spend. Based on my research and infinite general knowledge, i think that it can go from anywhere $200 to $400 and up, depending on the negotiation. Wanting to sound confident and savvy and not cheap, i blurted out “...about $300 to $400”, and she said easily “yes”, implying that is sufficient to “do it” without being explicit. I thanked her and told her i will call her back, wanting to sample the situation a bit.

Sex ads printed on little cards are handed out by mostly Latinos and some blacks to tourist pedestrians on the main street after dark. If one accepts every card handed out on every block, one can collect up to 40 unique cards in a day.

Another i called is from the card handed out from the street. I don't recall the details, but she plainly told me she only does dance. (I don't think this is true for all card ladies. In this type of business, “negotiation” is a big thing.)

Another i called is a brunette Jane i found in vegasadultdirectory.com. I've always wanted to fuck a blonde, but somehow blondes can be intimidating to me. At the end it is Jane who knocked my hotel door. I called her at 8 pm. Told her to come at 9 pm. Because of nervousness, i went downstairs to a nearby casino Boulders and gambled a hundred or so, and had a drink of the delicious Pina Colada. In some 30 minutes of wandering i won 2 hundred or so. That emboldened me. I called Jane and told her to come at 9:30 pm instead because i might be late.

(Jane's web site image of herself as of 2003-10-25: Jane 1 Jane 2. And here's her image from her website around 2003-11, which is how she actually looked when she came to my room: Jane 3, Jane 4)

Jane knocked my door on time. Indeed, she is a college girl. She's been doing this for 8 months. She is a brunette, brown eyes. About perhaps 160 cm. Sweet. Non-imposing, and quite friendly. Basically more or less like a girl you would meet in college. She is getting a degree for accounting or education. She is studying thru online programs. She told me DeVrie. She said she'll be 21 tomorrow. We talked a bit, for perhaps 5 minutes, then went to my hotel bedroom. She got totally naked, i had my shorts on in the beginning. We talked a bit more. She has a tummy, seems like pregnancy, but i don't want to be rude and ask. She is sweet and honest. Told me she sleeps with about 5 persons a week. (might be exaggerated) Has some regular clients.

Her cell phone rang at least 3 times in the beginning, and she had picked up twice, but it always interrupted us. Once it was her bodyguard or such, calling to make sure this outing is alright as a routine process i guess.

I've also asked her if she is afraid of venereal deceases, and she said she always use a condom and has a check up every month and now twice a month. She said she doesn't do anal regardless of pay. She is not an athletic type. I asked her to sit on me and later stand on the table for my photographing, and she didn't do them. She also doesn't do pissing, even by herself.

In the beginning i gave her $300 as we agreed. Later i asked if i can take photos of her and she declined at first. After some cajoling with $50 offer, she agreed. Near the end, i thought i ran out of time and i wanted to extend some 10 or 15 minutes, and offered her another $50. Then i only have $100 bills, so i gave her that and she kinda wanted to take it all but just returned me $20. All in all, she got $430 out of barely 1 hour's time.

This encounter was a happy encounter. It was a eye-opener for me, and she got much more money than normally would with little service. From this experience, i learned that normal prostitution is really a mundane affair, nothing like one'd thought from watching movies. Basically, it's just a college girl or otherwise female who don't mind fucking for a living, and she just does. The way to do it depends, just like how one'd find jobs in other fields. Prostitution isn't a god-send or money-tree or a wondrous speciality nor is it particularly abused or victimized. Sure, few hundred dollars for one hour is quite good for a non-professional, but quite a few things offset it. On one hand, agencies suck money out of you, just like anything in real world. Being independent faces lots of problems, among which is advertising and security. And, i learned that there are serious competition, which ultimately drives income down. (she has told me that there are people on the street who would fuck for $100 bucks.) The “clients” most likely are the most abominable type of guys that one would find aversive. My wild guess is that the majority of prostitute visitors are first timers or so, and many of these guys may not treat the prostitute very well due to ignorance.

Some movies picture high-priced call girls who are well educated, smart, doing the most pleasurable activity in life and makes a lot money. I suppose such exists, but rare. Like in other areas, it takes a smart woman who can be high-up in other walks of life just as well.

(Note: Names are not actual, for privacy reasons.)

Extracted from http://xahlee.org/Periodic_dosage_dir/las_vegas/20031015_copulate.html

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The Dark Knight

1.41pm
I'm on the train on my way to Marcus's office. Butterflies in my stomach. Hungry stomach to b exact. I havent had lunch as i'm on a diet :-P
Hopefully there wont b any awkwardness as we seem to hit it off pretty well via sms.
Hopefully he's not butt ugly either.
Hopefully.

xoxo.

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