As both my regular readers will know, I sometimes like to hit a religious note on a Sunday, and what better Sunday than today when the Pope's State Visit to the UK comes to an end?
So as we wish his Holiness a fond farewell, with these heartfelt words : "Fuck off and don't come back!", I have prepared a little souvenir of his stay in the UK in the form of the following document :
From : H.M Government of the United Kingdon
To : Pope Benedict, The Vatican, Italy
INVOICE
| Item | Charge |
|---|---|
| Provision of Security Services during Papal Visit | £ 15,000,000.00 |
| Shortfall in Catholic Church's contribution to events | £ 3,200,000.00 |
| Hire of Stadia and marshaling services | £ 5,000,000.00 |
| Administration and management fees | £ 9,000,000.00 |
| Fine for breach of law re right of sexual expression | £ 10,000,000.00 |
| Fine for inciting religious hatred against non Catholics | £ 5,000,000.00 |
| Fine for breach of law on sexual equality by refusing to ordain female ministers | £ 10,000,000.00 |
| Penalty for preverting the course of justice in relation to abuse of minors by Catholic priests | £ 50,000,000.00 |
| Compensation for minors abused by aforesaid priests | £ 40,000,000.00 |
| Sub-total | £ 147,200,000.00 |
| Plus : VAT at 17.5% | £ 25,760,000.00 |
| TOTAL PAYABLE | £ 172,960,000.00 |
I think that should keep him away for another year or two...


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