Bullshit bingo!


Don't know about you, but I'm getting to the point where listening to all the parties droning on is beginning to get to me!


So come on guys, let's bring some colour into the campaign! Spice up your rhetoric! You know you can do better!

Here's a list of just a few of the useful phrases I have already spotted some of you using (you know who you are!)....

  • Let me just pop something into your mental microwave and see if it defrosts
  • The wheel's spinning but the hamster's dead
  • We’re not cutting back, we’re just shortening the waste chain
  • We've got to downsize our sloppiness
  • We need to ensure we're all singing from the same hymn sheet before we push forward
  • Scatter the ideas across the floor and let's see where the chickens scratch
  • We will introduce a radical cost reduction action plan (C.R.A.P.)
  • Unemployment is higher than it was in 1994, but not as high as it would have been if the others had been in power
  • We will cut the deficit by ensuring that the increase in our rate of overspending is not as high as it otherwise would have been
  • I'll do whatever I can to make sure that the future of this country becomes entrenched
  • Frontline services will be protected but it may be necessary for some frontline services to be reclassified into the backoffice
  • Government waste is running out of control and it is essential that we ensure that any future waste will not be unnecessarily wasted (sorry?...)
  • Management is essential but we must ensure that these managers are effectively managed
  • We need to increase National Insurance so that it is not necessary to increase taxes
And my own particular favourite :
  • We need to deliver simplified contract management, effective service evolution and responsive scaling to requirement bringing cost savings by flexible services, control and balanced service levels
I will leave it up to you to work out who used that particular little gem...

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